Rheam, Robb and Cheatam
Incompetents at Law

Dear Pilfering, Blood-sucking Leaches:

In response to your claim that your defendant suffered any punitive damages is the most ridiculous charge I have ever heard in my life. Without a doubt he is obviously suffering from delusions brought upon by his failure to seek medical attention for his STD's he claims contracted at the Bear Creek, but in reality were the direct result of dragging his genitals across the floor of the free clinic. His hopes of convincing others in the community that this burned out wanna-be musician could still appear to be desired by the opposite sex are absurd. Or in Capt. Rumbelly's case the same sex (rope sucking faggot). Please do not try to take this inappropriate position in favor of Capt. Rumbelly. It will not benefit anyone in the long run and will only prove to be costly for your firm. I have in my possession video tape taken from surveillance cameras of your client personally forming this so-called miraculous Mother Mary sculpture with his own hands, and the detailed workmanship on the face and hands with his foul mouth and tongue. Save your client embarrassment and money. Drop all charges or this video will be made public.

Have a super day and a better tomorrow.